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Emily Post's Etiquette, 17th Edition

From Clueless to Class Act: Manners for the Modern Woman

From Clueless to Class Act: Manners for the Modern Man

The Art of Civilized Conversation: A Guide to Expressing Yourself with Style and Grace

How To Be A Lady: A Contemporary Guide to Common Courtesy

Having class never goes out of style.

You needn’t be a descendant of Emily Post to know how to dress for a special occasion or leave a decent tip. Daily life can be smoother and nicer when you’re able to handle social situations with ease. Here’s your invitation to learn:

Proper table settings and dining decorum
Best behavior for any situation, whether an interview, a meeting, or a date
Guidelines to being a great host and guest during special occasions

Etiquette vs. Manners

Though the terms “etiquette” and “manners” are related, they don’t mean exactly the same thing.

Etiquette: A set of guidelines about how to behave in specific situations (which fork to use, whom to address first, and so on)
Manners: The general notion that one should always be respectful and considerate of others

Manners and etiquette usually exist in perfect harmony. On occasion, though, people can be such sticklers for etiquette that the “rules” become more important than simply being considerate. This is a mistake.

Manners should always take precedence over etiquette: basic kindness and thoughtfulness come before nitpicky rules. When in doubt, show good manners and you’ll always look your best.

Five Guidelines for Good Manners

Treat everyone with respect: Don’t reserve good manners only for people you’re trying to impress. Show good manners to anyone and everyone.
Mix honesty with tact: Honesty is the best policy, but never use honesty as an excuse to be hurtful.
Show consideration: Make it a point to do the little things: say “please” and “thank you,” respond promptly to invitations, and be on time. Use your words and actions to show people you value them.
Be flexible: Not everyone grew up with the same rituals, customs, and rules that you did. Be sensitive to local laws, and lapses, of etiquette.
Never humiliate: Never make anyone look bad in public. That includes mocking someone, commenting on someone’s clothes or appearance, or publicly pointing out someone’s bad behavior or lack of etiquette.

These rules shouldn’t restrain you entirely from alerting someone to an embarrassing gaffe or from correcting someone’s bad behavior. But offer this type of advice in private, where you won’t cause embarrassment.

Acknowledgments