Contents
How to Announce Your Engagement
How to Envision Your Wedding
How to Pay for Your Wedding
How to Choose and Hire Vendors
How to Choose Wedding Venues
Food and Drink
Wedding Invitations and Stationery
How to Plan the Ceremony
How to Plan Your Wedding Reception
Wedding Photography
Wedding Attire
Other Wedding Events
Wedding Gifts
Wedding Logistics
Wedding Planning Checklist
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How to Plan the Ceremony
Wedding ceremony planning involves two main issues:
- Which friends or relatives you want to participate in the ceremony
- What you want to happen during the ceremony
Attendants
Attendants are friends and relatives who participate in the actual wedding ceremony. Traditional attendants include:
Attendant |
Responsibilities |
Who to Choose |
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|
Maid of honor (“matron”
if married)
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Helps bride plan; helps bride dress before wedding; throws bridal shower and bachelorette party |
Bride’s closest female friend or relative; should be attuned to every detail of wedding |
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Best man |
Leads groommen, ushers; gives toast; throws bachelor party |
Groom’s closest male friend or relative; should be reliable |
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Bridesmaids |
Help throw bridal shower and pick out gift for couple |
Close female friends/
relatives of bride or groom |
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Groomsmen (ushers) |
Escort guests to seats; lay down aisle runner |
Close male friends/relatives of groom or bride |
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Flower girl |
Walks down aisle throwing flower petals or carrying flowers |
Young girl close to couple; old enough to walk down aisle alone |
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Ring bearer |
Walks down aisle carrying pillow with rings on it; gives rings to best man and maid of honor |
Young boy close to couple; old enough to handle responsibility of the ring |
Some couples may have all of these attendants, whereas others may choose to have no attendants at all.
Officiant
The officiant is the person who marries the couple. An officiant may be a priest, rabbi, other religious leader, judge, justice of the peace, or ship’s captain. A friend or loved one may officiate if he or she gets registered by the state. This may require getting ordained as a minister—doing so is free via the Universal Life Church (www.ulc.org), though not all states accept ULC ordinations. In any case, make sure the officiant you choose:
- Doesn’t charge an exorbitant fee
- Is willing to help you create the ceremony you want
- Can attend the rehearsal the day before the wedding
The Wedding Ceremony
You can choose to follow your religion’s traditional wedding ceremony or create your own ceremony from scratch.
- Traditional wedding: Choose an officiant who is familiar with your religion’s proper order of worship, or sequence of events, for a typical wedding ceremony.
- Personalized ceremony: Research weddings from different cultures and select your favorite elements from each. Discuss your ideas with your officiant.
Sequence of a Typical Wedding Ceremony
Most weddings include the following events, in this order:
- Procession: The family and wedding party enter down the central aisle, trailed by the bride (usually with her father or both parents).
- Opening words and invocation: The officiant gives a welcome message, a statement of the purpose of the gathering, and perhaps also a prayer.
- Readings or performances: Readings from religious or literary texts, or musical performances
- Exchange of vows: The bride and groom make declarations of love and promises about the future.
- Exchange of rings: The best man and maid/matron of honor usually carry the rings and hand them to the bride and groom at the appropriate time.
- Pronouncement of marriage: The officiant declares, “I now pronounce you husband and wife.”
- Kiss: The groom kisses the bride.
- Recessional: The wedding party exits down the aisle.
Wedding Ceremony Flowers
- Bouquets: The bride and bridesmaids typically carry bouquets. The traditional bridal bouquet is white, though colored bouquets have become more popular.
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Corsages and boutonnieres: Mothers and grandmothers of the couple usually wear corsages or carry small bouquets. The groom, groomsmen, ushers, fathers, and grandfathers wear boutonnieres.
Wedding Ceremony Music
Ceremony music can be provided by organists, choirs, hired musicians, friends, or a sequence of recorded music.
When to Have Music
Ceremony music is typically played at the following times:
- As the guests arrive
- During the procession
- At specific moments during the ceremony
- While the bridal party exits down the aisle
- As the guests depart
Wedding Rings
You should buy wedding rings 4–6 months before your wedding. Rings come in a variety of designs and metals:
- Design: Wedding rings range from plain to ornate. Plain bands are still the most popular and often the least expensive. Rings can have matte or satin finishes.
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Metal: Most wedding rings are yellow gold, white gold, or platinum. Platinum is more expensive but stronger than yellow or white gold.
Men’s rings are usually thicker and more expensive (since they contain more metal) than women’s rings. A ring fits well if there’s just enough room to fit a toothpick between the band and your finger.
Receiving Line
After the ceremony, members of the wedding party may form a receiving line to greet the guests. A typical receiving line follows this order (from beginning to end of the line):
- Mother of the bride
- Father of the bride
- Mother of the groom
- Father of the groom
- Bride
- Groom
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